Is anyone reading these? Am I screaming into the void? Am I talking to myself? Is this cheaper than therapy?
The answers are yes, yes, a little bit, and God yes.
Moving on…
1) Read a post where someone was listing their choices for “good” and “bad” classic novels. I was curious because A) they considered THE RED AND THE BLACK a “bad” classic, which I vehemently disagree with; and B) I was curious by what they classified as a classic novel.
Is it a classic if it’s over 100 years old and is still in print? Over 50 years old and still in print? Possibly (to both).
Is it a classic if it’s included in a college curriculum? Eh, not sure about this one. I’m sure there are plenty of contemporary novels that are being discussed in various college classrooms, but not all of them will be considered a “classic.”
Again, I’m unclear what constitutes a classic.
Fortunately, I didn’t have to get far down this person’s list before realizing they considered their own favorite novels as classic. Number two on their list was INFINITE JEST by David Foster Wallace.
Now folks, I’ve met some people who are familiar with this novel. I’ve met some people who have started reading this novel. But I don’t think I’ve ever talked to anyone who finished it. I attempted to read it several times, and can’t say I ever made it past a hundred pages.
Which, by the way, is not very far because INFINITE JEST is over a thousand pages. It’s not an easy read. It’s not something you’d crack open and try to read in bed, because if you started to drift off and the book slipped from your hands and hit you in the face, you’d end up with a black eye. Maybe even a broken nose.
Look, I’m not bashing Wallace. I very much enjoyed his nonfiction pieces, and his article about attending the adult video awards in Las Vegas is both one of the funniest and saddest things I’ve ever read. But I could not get into this book.
Maybe that’s on me. Maybe I just wasn’t in the proper headspace for it. But if you’re going to list it as the second best novel (WAR AND PEACE was listed as number one, and I have no issues with that), I think you should make the distinction you’re listing your favorite novels, and not the best classic novels.
And I want proof you read the whole damn thing.
2) Speaking of classic novels, years ago, back during my college days, I took several classes with the same instructor: requisite English classes and several electives (Survey of American Lit 1 & 2, and so forth). If there was an elective I could take that had us reading books and writing a critical analysis of such, I was sure to sign up for it. Many times, it was the same guy teaching it.
Being as I had the same instructor 5 times in a row, we developed a friendliness and would sometimes banter during class, sometimes getting into long back-and-forth conversations about various books and authors. My classmates occasionally enjoyed this and would participate. Sometimes they rolled their eyes.
One such discussion was, which classic novels could be published today, as is (no editorial interference, no extensive rewriting, and no contemporizing the subject matter), and would still sell and be well received.
We agreed THE GREAT GATSBY could be published today and readers would generally like it. We agreed HUCKLEBERRY FINN would be problematic and would probably not be published without an extensive overhaul.
We disagreed on THE CATCHER IN THE RYE. I said it was a masterpiece. He said it was “highly overrated.” I was right, and he was wrong. Don’t argue with me on this.
Finally, I said, “What is the greatest novel ever written?”
He answered ULYSSES by James Joyce.
I pressed him on why (note: I hadn’t read it, and to date, still haven’t). He said that’s what most literature professors would say is the greatest. I pressed again: Okay, but what’s so great about it?
He admitted he had never read it. To me, this is akin to:
“What’s the greatest flavor of ice cream?”
“Chocolate.”
“Why is it the greatest?”
“I’ve never tasted it, but most ice cream experts would say it’s the greatest.”
3) Thinking about Gene Hackman. One of those actors who was always watchable, even in bad films.
When people talk about Hackman’s best performances, I either hear THE FRENCH CONNECTION, or I hear THE ROYAL TENENBAUMS. For me, I’d say THE CONVERSATION, followed by MISSISSIPPI BURNING, and ultimately UNFORGIVEN.
UNFORGIVEN is easily in my top 5 favorite movies of all time, and Hackman is a big part of why. His portrayal of Little Bill, the sheriff, has the first-time viewer going “Oh, he seems like a decent guy,” to “Oh, he’s kind of a jerk, but he’s just trying to maintain order in the town,” and finally to “Oh, he’s actually a sadistic bastard.” The constant shifting of the audience’s allegiance to the characters, and the fact that there are no clearcut heroes or villains in the movie (because they’re all fairly reprehensible at times) is one of the reasons I love it.
Hackman, though… Man, the way he delivers the line:
“I don’t deserve this. To die like this. I was building a house.”
That was top notch.
4) Podcasts are getting tougher and tougher to keep up with. Back in 2015, I made a joke that in the future, everyone will have their own podcast. And we’re just about there.
5) What I’m watching:
Caught THE GORGE on Apple TV, starring Anya Taylor-Price and Miles Teller.
It’s a fun movie about two highly skilled snipers who are tasked with guarding a large hole in the ground that periodically monsters are trying to escape from. The story doesn’t make a lot of sense, and you not only have to suspend your disbelief, but pretty much have to shut it off for the whole length of the movie, since… If you took three seconds to think about the plot, it would all fall apart.
There’s a good premise buried in amongst the “Oh, come on!” scenes, and the two leads actually have chemistry. Unfortunately, Sigourney Weaver seems to be sleepwalking through her scenes, few that there are.
One thing I was reminded of during the beginning of this movie is the shortcuts a writer will take in giving readers/viewers a character’s backstory. They have a character ask questions:
“So, I see here that your parents died when you were nine. You were raised in foster homes until you joined the army. Then you went to Afghanistan…” And so on.
This is similar to when you’re watching a movie and early on, when they explain what the situation is, somebody goes:
“You know who we need? We need Max Fistpunch.”
“Max Fistpunch? Who’s that?”
“Let me tell you about Max Fistpunch…”
Then comes a whole bunch of anecdotes about this person needed to solve the crisis.
The only lazier form of writing for giving you a character’s backstory is when they freezeframe on the character and list it in print next to their face.
Anyway, it’s a fun movie and worth your time. Once.
Still chugging through season two of SEVERANCE, and still enjoying it. I also think John Turturro and Christopher Walken are doing some of their best work on this show, acting-wise.
6) What I’m reading:
Finally started the Charles Bukowski book of essays. I’m finding it hard to stick with because the writing, much like his poetry, is very much stream of consciousness. Not really my thing. I kind of like an essay, or article, to have a point. But I’ll stick with it a little longer.
That’s your Dispatch for the week.
Slade Grayson is a writer who relies on the kindness of strangers. And readers. And sometimes strange readers. You can buy his books here, or buy him a coffee here.